Is That Really True?
There is this woman on the talk show circuit who impresses upon us that we ask ourselves the question 'is that true?'. The reason for this inquiry, as I understand it, is to learn to face a form of dishonesty about the way we perceive things.
I myself realised that what angered and stressed me was an issue which needed addressing, but I was rather annoyed by the simplicity of this woman's philosophy. This was because it was essentially deflecting my story of a situation back onto myself, and I wondered how this could help me in the given situation!
I decided to write her a letter explaining that her method was intrinsically flawed and whilst doing this I experienced an epiphany! After my lengthy diatribe which culminated with the statement 'the world is full of difficult people!' I decided to ask the question 'is that really true?' I finally had to admit that it was not.
It was my world which was full of difficult people and it was me who created difficult situations for myself that was the truth of the matter. As I wrote this, a car pulled into the car space opposite me with the letters HMM on the number plate! I was stunned and amazed! It was as if the universe was agreeing with me! The penny had dropped!
I realised that it was time to be totally honest with myself and see that it was my internal world that needed attention and not the outer world. This honesty was as enlightening as it was necessary. I felt truly liberated at that moment. Every time I have a stressful thought I now always ask myself that leading question and I am reminded of the importance of being honest!
Natasha Herman
Honest thoughts bring honest deeds
Honesty is the best policy so the saying goes. Honesty breeds honesty although not everyone would agree. Everyone seems to think that they might be robbed. Nonsense. Trust brings its own rewards. I have lost things from time to time, but have never had anything stolen. Recently I lost my handbag, with cards, photographs, cheque book and money £450 in cash. I was worried as I didn't know where I had left it. My instinct told me to wait. I did. Three days later I had a parcel carefully wrapped. Inside was my handbag intact. There was no address. No note inside. All I could do was send my thanks and blessings to the unknown person who had fount it, in some part of Great Britain.
Another occasion some time after my father's funeral my mother visited the cemetery in a very remote country parish. It was a windy day, and there, blowing in the wind, were notes money notes hundreds of them. She was alone money was blowing everywhere. Picking the notes up was difficult as they were still blowing. But her bag was tightly packed. She must have been very tired, but drove to the nearest police station which was some distance away, and handed them in. The following week the owner was found; he was so grateful he couldn't believe what she had done. He visited her and very generously gave her a beautiful, solid gold bracelet with diamonds a family heirloom. She treasured it, and I am now the proud owner. Honest thoughts bring honest deeds, so it's up to us to sow the seeds of honesty.
Audrey Petersen
Honesty the double-edged sword
Honesty, it has been said, is the best policy. However, in my experience, honesty has been both blessing and curse. In a world corrupted by greed, self-obsession and faηade, honesty which should be refuge, healing balm and a regulating motivating force, is more often rebuffed with fear, loathing and hostility.
Honesty is too often viewed as a threat or offence; an inflicted wound something dangerous to be thwarted and repelled, conveniently ignored, given no room for thought. Extreme as this may appear, this is what I've found.
Holding up the mirror to honesty can promote guilt and shame, but more positively can also reveal insights into a person's divine innocence which to the ego-orientated can be an extremely unwelcome recognition. Being a sincere, genuine, fair and unpretentious person can be a difficult path to take, making one an outsider, feared consciously and unconsciously. Mutual honesty however can draw partners, friends or associates together, bonding them with security and love through a more propitious understanding. Unfortunately though, I have found honesty generally only works between people who by nature are open, mature, and loving with a generous share of common sense, or who have had a sound training in communication skills. Therefore, having lived a largely honest life and suffered accordingly, my advice to any enquirer would be that honesty often doesn't pay and, in fact, can cost you enormously.
The paradoxical truth is, it would be far kinder (albeit irresponsible) to lie about this and to promote honesty at all costs.
Sally Asher
Is honesty always best?
Is honesty always best? I'm not sure!
We are very often not true to ourselves. We spend a lot of tome acting 'as if', compensating for our 'natural instincts'. We push ourselves into situations outside our comfort zone, although we'd rather not, and we, rightfully, control our behaviour when we feel angry, or have desires that, if we acted on them, would hurt others. We often stop ourselves overindulging in an unhealthy habit, though if we were being 'true' to ourselves, and we did what we felt like, we would act differently.
Letting go before we behave badly is what makes us different from animals.
To be more honest with ourselves, we would need to change the tension that creates the temptation to behave badly in the first place. Awareness of this is also what makes us different from animals, and, although we are all too aware of emotional pain, we don't see it for what it is a warning sign like physical pain is if you stick your hand in hot water.
Once it is recognised as this, the quickest way of dealing with it is to 'pull our mind away' on the spot, by creating a firm intention to 'let go'.
If our hand was getting burnt, we wouldn't be analysing why, or judging ourselves for having too many pain receptors!
Letting it go, although it initially feels strange and different, means the tension goes, and we can be much more authentic in any situation.
Liz Temple
Being authentic
What does it mean to be honest? Is it telling someone exactly what you think all the time? No. Is it being authentic? Yes. This is what I think that looks like: It is being in touch with who you really are and with what constitutes your unique blend of skills, qualities, talents and abilities. And, as you judge appropriate and maximally beneficial, it is choosing whether or not to communicate your truth to others in such a way that they will have the best chance of comprehending. I believe that if we all 'be' and act from who we really are, we will live in a world of authenticity, integrity and peace.
And then there is being honest with oneself. How challenging is that?! Conditioning and expectations (others' and one's own) tend to come into play. 'Is this really what I think?' or 'Is this what I really want? Of course, 'deep down' we do know how we feel and what we think and what we want. It's a matter of having the courage and the serenity to listen and pay heed to that voice within. And then the confidence to accept and honour whatever that voice is telling us. This honesty leads to inner peace.
This is the ideal. If we take even a few steps along this path we can congratulate ourselves.
Many years after it was first expounded, this maxim remains true: 'To thine own self be true and you will have nothing else to fear.'
Shβn Rees
Healing thoughts, drawn from the well of honesty
I have been thinking about Honesty through the day. I am reminded of something I experienced. Often we see things that have been done and we are shocked to imagine 'how can it be'? Yet I am honest enough (sometimes) to know that I play my part in the way things are. This is what I felt in the moment for a hedgerow that was 'slaughtered', numb until touching an Elder.
These thoughts could be for any that have experienced trauma such as these trees.
I am quiet for you, I am open for you, I am lost in a moment of pureness for you. With you I cannot face the sorrow, the savage picture seen by my eyes. I can only hold you in peace, for the moment, and pray that the terror may be dissolved, that there may be a depth of healing.
Then I touch you, with tender hand, a mothers hand, for being so human I know not what to do, only this. For you have been torn. Limbs torn, left gaping to the heavens.
There are no words for your pain, beyond even screams, there is only a silent pain not yet able to be felt. So I touch you with tenderness and pray with a silence of love, to meet the silent pain, to bring healing.
May we,
We who do such things,
Find the way of peace,
The way to love,
The way of tenderness to all things,
Peace Be
.
Deb
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